Friday the 13th Part 2 – Moonlight Swim

img496There are a few milestones in life that most people never forget – graduations, weddings, births, and even first kisses.  I’ve gone through all of those (yeah, that’s right – I kissed a girl!).  There’s another milestone that most of us remember even if we don’t all want to admit it.  Do you remember the first time you saw nudity?  If not, you must remember the first time you saw frontal nudity.

Of course, like anything worth talking about, this isn’t as simple as it seems.  Are you talking nudity from when you were too young to care?  I don’t think that counts.  The kind of nudity I’m talking about has to give you feelings you don’t quite understand.  That’s what makes it so memorable. Continue reading

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Dawn of the Dead – Bigger Bread

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I know it might be sort of contrary to everything that Dawn of the Dead really stands for, but I can’t help fantasize how awesome it would be to have the complete run of a fully stocked shopping mall. Fleeting as the pleasure may be, it’s an exciting prospect to imagine all your material desires at your fingertips.  I think this comes from a lifetime of seeing desirable things in stores and knowing that it’s out of my budget.  To throw those restrictions away would be enticing.  It’d be like winning the lottery without the headache of taxes.  My head tells me it’s no good, but my gut wants it all. Continue reading

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Halloween IV – Jamie’s Mother

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We all get laughed at, especially as kids.  It’s a hard line to draw between what’s all in good fun and what is hurtful and damaging.  Little kids seem to love it and will often go to absurd lengths just to make sure everyone is looking at them.  It’s sometime during primary or elementary school that I find some kids become exceptionally sensitive to the laughter of others.

Of course, this is all subjective.  When you feel like you’re in on it, it’s okay.  If people are laughing at some crazy/stupid stunt you did, it seems okay, “Yeah, I sure am a crazy guy!”  But if they hit on something you’re sensitive about (whether they know it or not), it can change the whole game – we can joke about my graying hair, but if you mention my sweaty armpits, we might have to fight. Continue reading

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Freddy’s Dead – Looking Young

Freddy's Dead - The Final Nightmare (Front)

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I’m not sure when that moment is between when we are kids trying to seem older and when we become adults hoping we can still pass for 5 or 10 years younger.  We always want to look like we’re in our prime.  I’m just not exactly sure when that prime is.  I’m guessing it’s somewhere in out 20s.

Growing up, I always looked young.  This isn’t as cool as it sounds.  What 13 year old wants to look 10?  The payoff was always going to be how gracefully I aged.  Somehow in the intervening years, I either skipped or didn’t notice when I was the optimal age outwardly.  As I notice gray creeping into the hair on my head and the stubble on my chin, I think it’s ridiculous that I ever desperately wanted to look older.  Why not just enjoy my youthful appearance and go compete against younger kids?  Surely creaming some elementary school kid would be good for a junior high school ego. Continue reading

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Halloween – Wandering Psychos

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Halloween is so beautifully paced that the viewer always gets a little bit of time to settle between spooky incidents.  There’s never enough time to be boring, but enough to maximize the effect of the low key scenes.  Something as simple as Michael watching Laurie in broad daylight while she’s at school is kind of unsettling. Continue reading

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Zombie Lake – My Inner Pervert

zombielake1I have a confession to make – I like looking at naked women.  I’m not even talking in an artistic or sophisticated way like you might see in a Radley Metzger film, not always at least.  What I’m talking about is unapologetic and crass.  It’s just naked women.  I know that this can justifiably be perceived as sexist, objectifying, and offensive but that primordial jelly part of my brain just doesn’t care.  To deny this in the face of political correctness would be dishonest and if there’s anything that I value here, it’s honesty.  Honesty and nudity. Continue reading

Posted in 80s, Euro Horror, sexploitation, Sleaze, Smut, Zombies | Tagged , , , , | 32 Comments

Sleepaway Camp II – The Green Pool

sc2I’m not an outdoors-y person at all.  I do love camping though, and I’m pretty sure this comes from my complete adoration of 80s camp set slasher movies.  The more a campground looks like something I saw in Friday the 13th, Sleepaway Camp, or The Burning, the more likely I am to completely fall in love with the place. Continue reading

Posted in 80s, Sequels, Slasher | Tagged , , , | 31 Comments